Sunday, 21 December 2008

Dear Marc....

marc & i 02marc & i

 

 

 

 

 

 

I cannot believe that it's 20 years!!!!  20 years and a few days since I last spoke to you.... 20 years and about a month since I last saw you....

and had I known that would have been the last time I would speak to you, I would have tried to make that one last conversation more meaningful.... I would have said goodbye.... I would have said take care of yourself.... I would have said I'll miss you more than I could ever have thought possible....  I would have told you not to fly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Unfortunately you didn't miss your flight.... unfortunately that flight became the last flight you would ever take... you didn't even make it to your holiday destination.... there were people out there, evil people, who made sure you wouldn't.... and why? I have no idea.... I have no idea why anyone would want to cause so much pain to so many people....  why anyone would think nothing of murdering 270 innocent people.

We were glued to the news from the moment it happened....  we waited for news.... we waited for good news... we hoped, we prayed.... but eventually the news announced that there were no survivors....and we still continued to watch.... and we still continued to pray.... and we still continued to hope....  that they had made a mistake.... that you did survive... that you were the lucky one....  then confirmation came.... and your casket covered in a black sheet arrived at your parents' home in London... it was a box.... I was hoping this was an elaborate prank on your behalf and you would pop out from around the corner any minute now.... but when they lifted that box and I saw the effort those people used to do so, I understood that you were inside that box.... the heavens were crying.... grown men were crying.... your friends, your family.... everyone... and all I could see was the image of the carcass of your airplane.... that image is now imprinted in my psyche forever... I hate that image!!!!!!!!!!!

So I found these old pictures of us when we were really little and I keep the one of me kissing your cheek on my cork board next to the computer, so I can see it everyday and try to delete those horrific images from my mind....  this one below, I keep it on a wall in my living room... the pictures are fading.... the memories are fading.... the pain remains.....

marc

Marc A. Tager (1966-1988) with former P.M. Yitzhac Shamir

So much has happened in the last 20 years... some of it is just a blur.... I wonder if you know.... I named my son after you.... I hope he grows up to be half the man you were....

your smile... your warmth, your compassion, your generosity, your joie de vivre, your friendship, your jokes and yes, even your pranks, are the things I miss the most.... you were definitely too good for this world... and I really hope you are in a better place, otherwise nothing makes sense....

my dearest Marc.... my dearest cousin,  you are and you will always be in our hearts, thoughts and minds.... but what you are and will always be the most is missed.

With all my love,

Triz xxxx

33 comments:

  1. I weep...such a moving tribute to your beautiful cousin, Marc...always in your heart, dear, dear Triz. And surely, none of us will EVER forget...

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  2. I'm so sorry. It's hard to believe (from the outsider's perspective as well) that it's been 20 years -- a long time to have been without Marc. :-(

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  3. So sorry to hear this story- a wonderful tribute to someone who must have been very special. I still remember the pain I felt when I heard about this atrocity,but nothing like the pain you & your family felt. Comfort & blessings as you remember.

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  4. I was going through my Entrecard dropping and saw your beautiful tribute to your cousin. I am sorry for your loss, but the memories still hurt.

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  5. Oh, how awful! I'm so sorry. And unlike the old "time heals all wounds," I'm sure the hurt cuts just as sharply today as twenty years ago.

    I can't imagine what you went through then. I'm sure Christmas has always been "four days since..." for you. I'll be praying for your comfort and some sort of joy for you and your family.

    Page

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  6. I recently came across your blog and have been reading along. I thought I would leave my first comment. I don't know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often.


    Susan

    http://www.car-insurance-choices.com

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  7. Wow - I'm crying with you. Thank you for sharing this tribute and your memories with us.

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  8. Dear Triz, I have tears in my eyes as I read this very moving post. I can't put into words what I am feeling for you at this moment. Just take care and my thoughts are with you and your family.

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  9. Wishing you nothing but beautiful memories and a heart at peace! ((hugs))

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  10. Tears come to my eyes as I read this beautiful tribute. I can still remember the overwhelming sadness I felt back in 1995 when visiting Lockerbie and the memorial at Dryfesdale Cemetery. Nothing like the pain you, your family and all the other families feel. My prayers to you.

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  11. I'm so sorry for your loss. I wish I had the right words to ease your pain, I know that it doesn't go away...

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  12. I'm so sorry for your loss. I wish I had the right words to ease your pain, I know that it doesn't go away...

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  13. My heart goes out to you. I am so sorry for your loss.

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  14. Oh Triz, how very sad, I remember this awful tradgedy very well.The pain of losing someone dear to you never goes away, but hopefully the good memories you have will be treasured forever.

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  15. Triz - The tribute you wrote to Marc is heartwrenching. I hope you can convey to your son just how special his cousin was and how much he meant to you.

    Losing someone like that is unimaginable, but it teaches us to cherish the moments we have with those we love.

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  16. Sorry for your loss.. that was a very touching tribute..

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  17. God bless... so sorry Triz...
    (please take the time and make copies of the photos)

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  18. It is hard to believe it has been 20 years since the Lockerbie tragedy. Thank you for sharing your memories of your cousin. What a beautiful tribute to him!

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  19. Triz, what a lovely tribute to Marc; thank you for sharing.

    And please take Story's advice and have copies made of your photos.

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  20. What a wonderful memorial. I'm sorry.

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  21. Out Of Topic: I just want to say... HAPPY NEW YEAR 2009!!!

    From: Brillie
    http://luphobia.com/brillie

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  22. Thank you for sharing such a poignant memory. My thoughts are with you as you remember such a life changing moment.

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  23. So much to say but there are no words....his life was cut far too short. (((((HUGS)))))

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  24. How terrible to carry such pain of loss. And what makes it so much worse, is that it was caused by human actions. So unnecessary.

    I feel your pain. Life is bittersweet at best, and it seems unfair when a family is dealt this sort of blow.

    Keeping him alive in your heart is a good thing. Wishing you peace...

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  25. Triz I am so sorry for your lost. I also grieve over the loss of my twin sister. It's been 38 years a few days. My heart hurts with yours.
    Peace be with you. Bev

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  26. ohmg I am so sad and totally cried when reading this. What a beautiful tribute to a very amazing man.

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  27. What a wonderful, touching tribute to your cousin's life.

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  28. Dear... Dear Patricia ! No words...!

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  29. A touching tribute, Triz. Thank you for sharing.

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  30. Hi Triz, how beautiful I'm crying reading this. Marc was on my MAL Israel Tour when we were 15 and we spent many holidays together in Herzlia in our family homes. He really was a gorgeous man in every way and every day right now especially the horrors of that day are in the forefront of the world news.................Thanks for sharing the photos, Ruti Ahronee

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  31. Will never forget him

    Eddie xxx

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